How We Made a Perfect Fit

Holding hands image
Perfect fit.

Several posts ago, I wrote about “a life less solitary” followed by vague updates about what’s happened since. There’s so much to say about my time in Pennsylvania, the road trip, and how our lives have changed since we’ve been back home…but I still lack the time and energy to type it all out so I’ll save that for later. Our reunion has been incredibly wonderful; thirty-five years is a long time to be physically apart, but the foundation we built long ago even {before we were aware of it} made it easy for us to resume that closeness and intimacy so quickly.

The last month has been a whirlwind of chaos, beginning with my flight up to Pennsylvania. There’s been a hospital stay, road trip, another hospital stay, follow-up appointments, furniture assembly/re-arrangement, time re-adjustment {thanks to “springing forward” and jet lag} and a multitude of various miscellaneous issues that have popped up all throughout. All the activity of the past month has made it feel like we’ve been together for years and maybe it’s because of our history that we feel that way.

Despite the ups and downs, I find that I’m far less stressed than I was 4 months ago. Before 6 years ago, I’d never experienced life on my own and it was a daunting task, particularly after 16 years of being in an abusive relationship. The time by myself was necessary because I needed to know that I could live independently {despite being told I couldn’t}…and I did. Although I liked being in control of my life, I still wanted to share it with someone. We’re constantly reminded that we don’t “need” relationships or someone to “complete” us, but I think that’s not entirely true. it just depends on how we define “completing us”. Recognizing the difference between “needing” and “wanting” a relationship is very important. We must be healthy alone before we can be with someone else. The way I look at it, I have found someone whose presence enables me to do the things that I didn’t enjoy doing alone. Instead of completing me {as a person}, he enhances the mundanities of my daily life, while expanding the realm of possibilities for new adventures. We appreciate each other as people and we show each other our appreciation for every gesture or favor, no matter how small. Knowing that we can turn to each other for support/comfort is something we’ve never had before…and that security certainly makes life a lot less scary.

 “I could conquer the world with one hand…as long as you were holding the other.” ~ Unknown

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