Update: 29 Nov – 5 Dec

This week was pretty uneventful, apart from one appointment on Monday at the Pregnancy Help Center. Sarah is coming up on her 9th week tomorrow and still reports a bit of cramping and some nausea, which affects her appetite. This week will be slightly busier ~ 2 appointments, one with a nurse at the Pregnancy Help Center on Monday and the 2nd prenatal one on Wednesday.

For the most part, Sarah has received a lot of support and love from her friends, which I think is very important. My friends have offered me unrivalled support, making everything so much easier to come to terms with. There’s still some tension in the house, but it’s nothing we haven’t been through before. With 2 hormonal women, it’s bound to happen. A menopausal mum and pregnant daughter can sometimes result in a few fireworks {big apologies to my son!}.

We going to do more walks in the park for exercise. For some reason, age and the cold have not been kind to my right knee, so I’m guessing I have the beginnings of arthritis and it’s time to do something about it now so that I can have the energy, ability and inclination to keep up with a toddler when the time comes.

 The last 4 weeks have been interesting, to say the least. We’ve had a lot to come to terms with, but we’ve managed well, all things considering. I’d like to close with some thoughts, in the hopes that anyone out there who’s reading this and going through a similar situation:

  • That my daughter is pregnant is a fact. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s happened and there’s nothing anyone can do to change it. I chose to view it as a positive thing because I believe in making the best of whatever life hands me.
  • Keep in mind that {those people} who react with disapproval and judgment have no bearing on the situation; {those people}: 1/ don’t live your life; 2/ don’t know the circumstances; 3/ have nothing valuable to offer, if not their compassion and support; 4/ would most likely react the same way in similar circumstances.
  • A new life is a joy, even in less-than-ideal circumstances, particularly when a family has suffered through loss. As they say, when one life ends, another begins; The loss of my mother was very painful, but the birth of my grandchild will detract from my feelings of grief.
  • The best thing a parent can do for their teen in such a situation is to stay calm and be as understanding as possible. Hysteria, threats, punishments, criticism only bring more stress for everyone concerned and close the lines of communication. My daughter was way more willing to talk to me when she saw that I was staying calm.
  • Discussing options, however important, must be done only from a place of calm and after everyone’s had some time to digest the news. Taking the time to explore every option in full detail is necessary to make an informed decision. When my daughter and I were talking about abortion, I let her know that I would support her in any decision she made, but I also made sure she knew it was a permanent choice and that there was no going back. I also explained that she had absolutely no way of knowing how such a decision would affect her once she did it.
  • This, as with any other experience or situation, is an opportunity to learn and grow. We have met/will meet people we never would have met otherwise.
  • Perhaps, because of our request for delayed cord clamping, there will be a greater awareness of the practice on this side of the pond…and all because we know a strong advocate in the U.K. who has done marvelous work to illustrate the benefits.

Until next time…

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2 thoughts on “Update: 29 Nov – 5 Dec

  1. Am ignorant of common human birth processes. What is “Cord Clamping”? My experience comes from delivering dairy calves. My husband and I have no children by choice. Have a very strong stomach as far as not being grossed out by bloody happenings. I thought all umbilical cords were clamped off after birth, or am I wrong?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Delayed cord clamping is when the umbilical cord is left unclamped for 1-5 minutes so that the newborn can receive as much cord blood as possible, following the delivery. Studies have shown that it helps lessen the incidence of iron deficiency anemia. The cord has beneficial stem cells and immediate clamping deprives the newborn of those cells.

      For more info: http://www.positivebirthmovement.org/pbm-blog/everything-you-need-to-know-aboutoptimal-cord-clamping

      Liked by 2 people

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