Connect

Heart image
   Stay Connected.
  • She ~ the bored wife ~ was secretly there with the stranger from the website because she thought she would find something better than she already had.
  • She ~ the sheltered teen ~ was secretly there with the boy from school because she wanted the freedom to be herself without parental control, scrutiny, or judgment.
  • He ~ the starved husband ~ was secretly there with the stranger he met in a bar because he craved the intimacy, warmth, and closeness that his wife never gives him.
  • He ~ the lonely teen ~ was there with his like-minded friends because he wanted to feel accepted somewhere, even if only virtually.
  • She ~ the single parent ~ was there by herself, wishing for someone to stand beside her, being supportive, offering comfort, offering a refuge, if only temporary.
  • He ~ the lonely patient ~ was there in his private hospital room, realizing that everything that really mattered was glaringly absent.

Although our circumstances are unique, although we vary in our sensitivity, personalities, temperaments, beliefs, moral codes, reactions, perspectives, and experiences…whether or not we admit it to ourselves or those around us, we have one thing that binds us together as “the human race”:

Our desire to CONNECT.

We need to love, be loved, belong, feel accepted, feel appreciated, touch, be touched, experience intimacy, feel understood. {Whatever happens} to us in this life, we should never pretend that we have the capacity to deal with {those whatevers} on our own. Even if we can, it doesn’t mean we should. As someone who experienced forced isolation and the loneliness that accompanied it, I can honestly say that the need for any connection intensifies over time. The absence of love, belonging, acceptance, appreciation, touch, intimacy, understanding made me realize just how important it is to have those things and how easily we take them for granted.

A relationship is just that. We have relationships with everyone we meet, in varying degrees of closeness. Note that the existence of “a relationship” between two people indicates nothing more than simply knowing each other. It’s what we do within a relationship that makes it “good”, “bad”, “close”, “distant”, “romantic”, “platonic”, “loving”, “abusive”, “affectionate”, “controlling”, “complicated”, “painful”, “supportive”, “volatile”.

The bored wife doesn’t want to have to look elsewhere to get what she should be getting from her husband. She wants to feel appreciated and have intimacy with her husband.

The sheltered teen doesn’t want to hide things from her parents or resort to sneaking out. She wants the freedom to be who she is and make mistakes so she can learn from them.

The starved husband knows that he’ll never find the intimacy, warmth, and closeness with anyone other than his wife because it just isn’t the same when someone else lays her head on his shoulder.

The lonely teen wants to feel accepted and respected by his family and his peers, regardless of what he chooses to do. He doesn’t really want to connect solely with virtual strangers for a sense of belonging.

The single parent wants to know that someone has her back during the parental challenges. She’s tired of feeling exhausted and unsure of the decisions she has to somehow make without someone to brainstorm with. She wants the luxury of sleeping in, knowing that someone is there to ensure she’s not disturbed.

The lonely patient wants someone next to his bed, holding his hand, knowing he’ll be taken care of while the nurses are busy with other patients. He understands how things evolved to this point and wishes he could go back and change everything.

CULTIVATE the sort of relationships you want.

Stay CONNECTED.

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9 thoughts on “Connect

  1. This is beautiful. Most, even myself, believe that we are strong when we are able to face our own lives by ourselves. I am still trying my best to teach myself that real strength is by admitting that we need help from others and that we cannot survive on our own.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Even strong people need to be taken care of. I know from experience that having to be strong all the time is exhausting.

      Thank you for dropping by and commenting. I am glad we crossed paths. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for dropping by and posting a comment. 🙂

      It’s funny ~ I sat down to watch the movie that inspired this post and by the end of it, I felt affected enough to write about it. There’s inspiration in unexpected places.

      I do hope you’ll continue to visit. 🙂

      Like

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