It’s been five months since you left us and I know that you’d be fussing at me, telling me to stop being so sad. I know you’re in a better place, not suffering anymore and I feel comforted in the knowledge that you are with so many people who love you.
I just miss being able to pick up the phone to hear your voice and laughter. There’s so much I want to tell you and so much I wanted to know about your life. I thought we would have a lot more time to talk, create more memories, laugh at the silliness.
C has a job now and he wishes he could talk to you because he knows how happy you would be to hear all about what he does. He works and still does everything possible to help me around the house. S is a sophomore now and doing very well, in spite of everything she’s been through. She has come a long way since she arrived in this country and will go on to do great things. Every day, my children prove to me that I raised them well and it’s because you raised me well. I know you would be proud of them both, just as I am.
For the most part, I am okay, doing what I have to do. My friends are amazingly supportive, which has helped a great deal. I go to church for spiritual comfort and the cafe to keep up the writing so that I can help others. I don’t always succeed in working out 4 times a week but I am still exercising as much as I can (and when I feel like it). I’m going to be 50 in 4 months and need to keep my promise to myself that I am going to be the youngest looking “50” I can be.
Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you or miss you.
I love you, Momma. Always.